About three years ago, I read the book "Foreign to Familiar: A Guide to Understanding Hot- and Cold-Climate Cultures" by Sarah A. Lanier. It helped me understand what I had experienced living in Costa Rica as an exchange student, and I thought it would be a good thing to teach my Spanish 3 students at the time, since most Spanish-speaking countries are hot-climate cultures.

As I taught this unit, the students really struggled to understand why people in hot-climate cultures operated so differently than our cold-climate selves. They definitely felt like the cold-culture mindset was superior to that of hot-climate cultures. I did my best to explain that each culture has positives and negatives and that neither one is better than the other.

That was a great theory, but I'm struggling with the application. Now that I'm living in a hot-climate culture, it's sometimes difficult not to have those same feelings of superiority that my students had.

In her book, Lanier proposes that the primary distinction between hot- and cold-climate cultures is that cold climates are concerned with performing and finishing tasks in an efficient way, while hot climates are more concerned with maintaining a good relationship with the people they interact with. As a result, cold climates use direct communication whereas hot climates will say things indirectly for fear of offending someone.

These two differences, task vs. relationship and direct vs. indirect communication, are the most difficult for me to adjust to. My cold-culture mind struggles to find the positives in the hot-climate culture viewpoint. Let me give you some examples.

1) Our Spanish/culture teacher here in Peru explained to us that telling people you won't be able to make it to a certain function is seen as rude, and it's better to say, "Yeah, I'll try to be there," even if you know for sure that you can't make it. (Just for the record, she thinks that's silly, but she lived in the U.S. for two years, so maybe the "coldness" rubbed off on her.)

2) When we invite others to Bible studies, 90% of the time they say they will be there, and they actually show up about 10% of the time. It makes planning events kind of tough. Maybe we just need to come up with an indirect way to invite them to Bible study, so they don't feel obligated to say "yes."

3) Everything starts a good 15 minutes to an hour late because people don't arrive on time. I think sometimes they're late because they don't want to be rude and leave their previous engagement, or they talk to people on the way to where they're going. Obviously, there are many other reasons as well (most people here don't have cars, they work long hours in the field, etc.).

4) Because relationships take priority over tasks, tasks take a long time to complete. For example, when we go with our friend Nilda to advertise English classes or get ready for a birthday party at the center, she wants to eat with us at least once on our little excursion. The first time we went with her, we ate breakfast, lunch, and a snack. Also, we had to stop and talk to every person we ran into on the street that she knew (it's a small city, and she's lived here a long time). And every time we go, we end up being late for our next activity that day (like the birthday party we went shopping for in the first place or Katie's classes).

Perhaps I struggle most with these because on a personal level I highly value efficiency and honesty (maybe even more than your average cold-climate person), and in my mind the hot-climate culture prevents either from happening as often as I'd like. To me it seems like lying when someone says they'll be somewhere when they have no intention of going, and I really dislike being late to anything.

However, I realize that they have good intentions when they tell us they'll show up because they don't want to hurt our feelings. And fortunately, I highly value building relationships (in fact, it's kind of my job right now), so as long as that's happening, I can justify the time I'm spending on tasks that would take me much less time in the U.S.; and if the relationship-building includes food, even better.

I guess I'll just have to learn to be a little less scheduled, a little more patient, and say things in a nicer and less direct way. I could be learning worse lessons I suppose.

November in Peru

Oh, Peru!

My teammates and I have adopted a new saying that we use with frequency here. It's a multi-purpose phrase that can express so much with two little words, "Oh, Peru!"

Depending on how and when one says it, it can express joy, frustration, acceptance, and various sorts of amazement. Let me give you some examples.

Joy - Driving over ginormous sand dunes in a dune buggy with the sun shining brightly on a gorgeous day, and being amazed by the variety and beauty of God's creation. "Oh, Peru!"

Frustration - Going for a three mile run and being chased/barked at by at least 10 dogs (one of which is running frantically back and forth on the roof of a house, and you hope it doesn't pounce on you), having every other male between the ages of 14 and 70 make cat calls at you, and being honked at by about 20 cars (some honks are "hey, baby" honks and others are "watch out, I'm speeding down the mountain, and I'm not going to make much of an effort not to hit you, so get out of my way" honks). "Oh, Peru!"

Amazement (positive) - Running into the neighbors and their whole family as they are leaving the birthday party of their grandma (who died 2 years ago--yes, they still celebrate their birthdays long after they are gone), and having everyone hug and kiss you and run inside to get you some cake to take home with you. "Oh, Peru!"

Amazement (maybe not so positive) - Having a guy (someone you consider a nice, decent guy) ask you to go with him to Lima to the store where his girlfriend works and walk by her counter holding hands to see if she'll get jealous. This is apparently the best way to see if his girlfriend really loves him. He specifically wants you to go because she also has light skin (but not as light as you), and she told him that he couldn't find anyone prettier than her. Thanks for the compliment (I guess), but no thanks. Ever heard of trust? "Oh, Peru!"

Acceptance - Realizing that when taking public transportation, you will probably always be squeezed hip to hip, shoulder to shoulder with friends and complete strangers alike. Seatbelts? Not anymore. 5 people in a 5 passenger car? It's usually a minimum of 8. "Oh, Peru!"

Here are a few other "Oh, Peru" moments for your reading enjoyment:

--Excursions with our Peruvian friend, Nilda. I think her motto must be, "Why do something in 2 hours when you can do it in 5?"

--The horns of Peru. There's quite a variety - normal horns, siren horns, musical horns, handheld horns. Vehicles and people use them for various reasons (see the two mentioned above), in addition to "watch out, I'm merging along with 4 other cars on a two-lane street," "do you need a ride?," and "step on it!" Not to mention the horns people carry by hand and blow as they walk up and down the street trying to sell things. The local fresh bread seller comes by on his bike with his horn at about 6:30 every morning. Love it.

--Every party turns into a dance party. I really love that.

--The electricity goes out in the whole town at least once a week, sometimes for less than an hour, sometimes for a whole day. I'm waiting for it to come back on now so I can go take a shower...we have an electric heater for the shower. It might be a cold one today.

--Devotions and prayer in my back yard while looking at the mountains and the papaya trees, and feeling the warmth of the sun shine on my back. It doesn't get much better.

(And now it's time for a cold shower. Still no electricity.)

Oh, Peru!

OOPS!

I am all too familiar with embarrassing situations and being the center of them. It happens even more frequently now that I'm operating in a culture I'm unfamiliar with and a language that I don't always understand. Let me share with you my most recent cause for "verguenza" (shame).

Katie teaches English at a community center, and the managers of the center, Pablo and Nilda, decided that each month they will have a party to celebrate the adult students' birthdays that month. Even though my birthday was in September, they wanted to include me in the October birthday celebration, which was a very sweet gesture. To prepare for the fiesta, Nilda, Katie, and I went to Canete (about 30 minutes away in bus) to buy food, decorations, and presents. At this point, I didn't realize they were going to be celebrating my birthday or that they'd get me a gift. Nilda saw a music box that opened and had a little diary in it that she loved, so while I wasn't looking she snuck off to buy it for me. At that point, Katie gave me the heads up that they were celebrating my birthday, and that I shouldn't ask questions when Nilda came back with a present.

We finished buying our things, and I went to the center to help decorate. The party started and things were going really well. There were about 20-25 adults there, and it was fun getting to know them and dancing and eating. Then the time came to open the gifts. We bought Spanish-English dictionaries for the students who had October birthdays, and Nilda had the music box wrapped and waiting for me. They had me stand at the front of the room, Katie presented me with the gift, and I opened it. I acted surprised, and I thought I should show everyone that it opened and played music and had a diary inside. So, I started lifting one side of it - the wrong side - and completely ripped the lid off the music box. OOPS! I glanced at Nilda, and she looked slightly horrified and pained that the cute little present was broken. Katie was trying not to laugh at me, and our Peruvian friend Christian was laughing at me. He kept looking at me and saying "mucha fuerza, mucha fuerza" (you're really strong) and cracking up. I had conflicting emotions. I felt horrible that I broke the gift that Nilda loved, I was embarrassed that all the people I just met saw me break a gift, and I also really wanted to laugh about the whole thing (and I did a little bit).

Before we left for the night, I made sure to thank Nilda again and explain that I could fix it (just needs a little glue). Later, we told the story to our friend, Gino, and ever since both Christian and Gino tease me about the incident all time, but I don't mind. In fact, I think it made us all better friends, and it's a never-ending source of laughter.

I think it's another example of how God can turn the mistakes in our lives into good. Thank God for grace, for working through us, and especially for working in spite of us.